


brig moss and breakfast

by spideywhiteys



Series: 365 Days of Naruto AUs [7]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, F/M, Fluff, Gen, chouji is very soft and nice, he just wants to cook, just somethin short and sweet, karui is exasperated and reluctantly fond, never written them before but?? they deserve a lil more content, pirates? PIRATES!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 12:21:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28617963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spideywhiteys/pseuds/spideywhiteys
Summary: Chouji isn't a fighter, he's a cook. As a pirate, that kind of skill set won't always save him. This time? It did.
Relationships: Akimichi Chouji/Karui
Series: 365 Days of Naruto AUs [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2086938
Comments: 5
Kudos: 26
Collections: why im sleep deprived 💖✨





	brig moss and breakfast

**Author's Note:**

> DAY 7: Pirates AU / Karui + Chouji

“Back up! Let me see him!”

Chouji is not where he wants to be.

He’d like to begin by saying that this is not, in fact, his fault. He’s completely innocent! He’s not even a very good pirate to begin with, so he’s basically worth nothing in a hostage situation like this!

The sun is still high in the sky, harsh and hot and drawing sweat to his brow. He was minding his business in the market, picking out only the  _ best _ ingredients for his crew—and sneaking a few snacks along the way, not that anyone had to know—when suddenly raiders from Kumo stormed the place and dragged him off. 

He shouldn’t have gone alone. But Shikamaru’s birthday was coming up, and he wanted to get a few surprise ingredients for his best friend! 

Chouji sinks in on himself, too nervous to meet the eyes of all his captors. He’s not exactly scared of what they’ll do to him. Their factions have never gotten along, but Chouji always considers the best in people and Kumo pirates haven’t actively killed Konoha pirates in the last ten years. Plus, Shikamaru will rescue him. Or Naruto. Probably with Shikamaru’s help. Either way, they’ll be here. 

Actually, if anything, Chouji is most concerned with the fact the food and spices he’d bought at the market are now strewn about the street where he’d been ambushed. Ruined.

“You know what you’re here for, Konoha?”

Chouji looks out to the sea, horribly saddened. He thinks of the fruit crushed underfoot, once perfectly ripe and unbruised. He thinks of the spices spilled across the ground like trash or dust, glass shards on cobblestones. He thinks of perfectly good cinnamon sticks, rare and expensive, destroyed! Dirtied! Unusable! Ino is going to kill him when she sees how much money they lost on the ruined food. 

“HEY!” A finger is thrust in his face.

Chouji backs up reflexively, wide eyed. A woman stands before him, skin even browner than the wondrous cinnamon sticks. Her eyes are golden, like a perfect cooked egg yolk or melted butter—framed with long, crimson lashes; lashes that match the beautiful shade of apple red hair framing her face. She’s dressed in the standard Kumo white and grays, a deep gray frock over a white ruffled shirt. There’s a gold sash around her waist, holding a short scabbard in place. A knife. Expensive looking. Chouji’s not great with weapons—that’s more of Sasuke’s thing.

“Uhm…” he begins, “Sorry, I was thinking.”

The woman smirks, “Well forget about it, there’s no way to escape.”

“No, no, I’m not smart enough to figure out an escape plan. I’m mostly just thinking about all the food waste.”

She blinks.

He blinks back.

“The...food waste?” Her expression screws into one of incensed confusion. “You...read the mood here! You’re a hostage!”

“I know that! But the food!  _ THE FOOD!” _

She backs up, pressing her fingers to the bridge of her nose. “If you know you’re a hostage, then ACT LIKE IT!”

Chouji lowers his head, feeling like a scolded child. “Oh, yes, sorry. Am I going to the brig?”

“Can you at least pretend to be a little scared?” 

* * *

So. Chouji’s in the brig. It’s very dark and  _ moist _ and he’s pretty sure there’s something like mold or moss growing in the corner of his cell, but aside from that it’s surprisingly clean. Not as clean as the  _ Kurama, _ because Sakura is very serious about sanitation.

He’s not very happy down here, but he  _ did _ learn the Captain’s name. Karui.

She’s been trying to get information out of him for the past hour and they’re both coming to the conclusion that Chouji knows jack about anything other than cooking.

“I’m telling you, I don’t even know how a ship  _ works.” _

“WHAT KIND OF PIRATE ARE YOU?” She screams, shaking the bars with her hands. 

Chouji chuckles sheepishly, “Well, I’m more of a cook. I leave the pirate stuff to everyone else, you know? I’m not much of a fighter.”

“Clearly.” Karui replies, grinding her teeth. She reminds him a little of Ino. Except prettier. (In his opinion. If Sai overheard that, Chouji might find himself waking one morning on his mattress, floating in the open ocean.)

“You don’t even have a weapon on you.” She sighs, seemingly talking to herself. “No wonder we managed to capture you so easily. If it weren’t for that damned leaf sigil you might as well be a civvie.”

Chouji twiddles his thumbs.

Karui narrows her eyes.

“So….is it almost lunch time?”

She leaves him in the brig. It’s perhaps the cruelest punishment he can think of, being denied lunch.

* * *

By the time night comes around, Chouji thinks he’s dying. He’s starving. He hasn’t eaten since breakfast. He’s really going to die here, alone, in a brig with moss growing in the corner. His stomach audibly protests, echoing around the space. He’s the only prisoner here—sorry,  _ Hostage. _ It’s a wonder he hasn’t been found by his friends yet. It’s been  _ hours. _ Maybe they’re doing negotiations. Shikamaru is definitely the type, as long as he knows Chouji isn’t hurt or dead. Shika is also the only one who can hold Naruto back these days.

But at this point Chouji is perfectly fine with Naruto crashing through the ship and starting a full-on turf war to rescue him. Because  _ food. _ FOOD.

The hatch opens. Moonlight streams in from the square opening, and the thud of boots descending can be heard. Chouji groans loudly to convey his sheer agony. 

“Relax.” Karui says, eyes rolling. In her hand is a plate of food.

Chouji’s eyes widen and he makes desperate grabbing motions at the plate. “You’re a goddess!”

Karui snorts, a smile pulling at her lips. Then she realizes what she’s doing and drops it back into a scowl. “Are you ever serious?”

“I’m always serious.” Chouji replies, very seriously. “Especially when it comes to food and my friends.”

Karui drops down into a stool by the bars, the same one she’d sat in earlier when trying to interrogate him, and gives him the plate. “Your friends have already contacted us. They don’t really look intimidating in the slightest, but that blondie has a way with words. It’s kinda crazy—hey, are you listening?!”

Chouji looks up from his already empty plate, his face screwed up in careful concentration. “This is a little undercooked. It would taste great with a little more—”

Karui smacks her head against the bars, groaning. There’s a smile on her face. “Why don’t you just cook breakfast then, if you’re such an expert?”

“Really?” He exclaims, practically sparkling. “Can I?”

She leans back and crosses her arms, trying her best to look strict. “Yeah, why not. Your friends will be over too. Like I was trying to tell you. So don’t think you can try and poison the food.”

“I would never! A true cook would never disrespect their craft like that!”

Chouji’s adamance must come across as genuine to her, because for an instant he sees her smile again. 

“Yeah,” she says, her eyes once again like melted butter, “Why am I not surprised.”

He can’t help but smile back, gut churning like he’s got indigestion. He’ll have to ask Shikamaru about it. Or Sakura. It’s probably nothing.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow / Support me on [Tumblr](https://spideyfoof.tumblr.com/) and let me know if you'd like to see more of this AU!
> 
> ur honor i love them????


End file.
